The Elder and Hospitality

by David Roadcup

In the list of qualifications for our work as elders, Paul mentions in 1 Tim. 3:2 that elders are to be “hospitable” or “given to hospitality.”  The concept of hospitality is as old as humanity.  The powerful effect of genuine hospitality communicates acceptance, warmth, care, concern and intentionality.  Following the nature of a transformed leader, the sincere practice of hospitality is needed by the body of Christ and expected by our Heavenly Father (Romans 12:13, Hebrews 13:2, 1 Peter 4:9).  

Hospitality is a dying art in our day and time.  Extreme busyness is one of the main reasons that hospitality is not practiced as in years past.  We can be too busy with the ebb and flow of our normal lives to make time for this important and ancient art.   

What does it take to make hospitality part of the life of an elder and his wife in the church?   

It takes intentionality.  We have to face the fact that almost all of us are extremely busy with jammed schedules.  We are all busy. Hospitality will not be mutually enjoyed in my home unless I intend for it to happen.  This is the key.  I must realize the great importance of opening my home and heart to those I shepherd and pursue it.  This ancient practice must be part of what I do as an elder. 

It takes time.  Time is today’s currency.  I know it is precious to all of us.  When we understand and internalize the great importance of hospitality and what it can do in people’s lives, it can move to a higher priority in our schedules. 

It takes focus.  We focus on the fact that great impact happens when we have people into our homes for a meal or dessert.  We remember our purpose and work as elders and make a way to include others in our schedules.  Focusing on this issue and making it happen is a part of the experience of hospitality. 

It takes a plan.  What does hospitality look like?   According to Scripture, hospitality is simply inviting people into your heart, home and schedule to spend time with you, eat together, have discussion together and blend our lives together in this context.  It may or may not involve an overnight stay.  It can involve having lunch together with others after church, or meeting for dinner on a weeknight.  The word itself, in the New Testament, Greek context, even means that we “love strangers” (https://biblehub.com/greek/5381.htm and https://biblehub.com/greek/5382.htm). That’s the beauty of this practice. When we deliberately engage in it, strangers transform into friends. Inviting non-Christians into our life and home is one of the most powerful ways to help people grow in Jesus - to make disciples.

Years ago, my wife and I discovered that we did not have to prepare an over-the-top homecooked meal to entertain. When we got home on Friday evening, after my week at the university and her week as an X-Ray technician, we were tired!  We discovered that we could order a really good pizza from a place near our home and simply prepare a couple light dishes to go with it when having others over. We found that it was not actually the meal, the menu, that was the most important aspect of our time together.  The power of this experience was realized when we walked through the the entire process mentioned above: we desired people to join us in our home, made the time, invited them, focused on them when they put their feet under our table; we enjoyed our meal together, told stories, laughed and shared quality time together. All of that was so much more important than whether or not we had invested 6 hours in preparing a homecooked meal!  

“Eldering” is a team sport - for the men who lead the church as well as for the elder with his family.  It takes the husband and his wife to make hospitality happen in their home.  As a team, we work together to make our home a place of welcome, impact and influence for others and their walk in Christ.    

Our work as elders involves connecting with, shepherding and loving the flock, and there is no better or more powerful way to do so than to practice biblical hospitality.   

If hospitality is not yet part of your leadership, start slowly and take an incremental step to begin this spiritual practice in your home.  You could begin by simply being the host for your small group, by having over a neighbor or two to “watch a game,” or any other reason, and deliberately plan out steps to have it grow from there. The impact and blessings, both, will be so beneficial to you and those you serve.