Things are Better than you Think
by Sherri Wynn
Pretty much every family has a family matriarch whose opinion actually matters. Even if family members disagree at times with that “head mama,” they still mull over what she says and rethink their own position—just in case. They still want her approval and her blessing, and they thrive on her encouragement.
As time passes, I now find myself the oldest female relative to whom the younger generations look for encouragement. I have grandsons in their twenties who call periodically to say a quick hi before going on with their day. But, an hour and a half later, we find that they’ve talked to me about their hearts’ desires and worries, and I find that we’re closer than ever despite distance or length of time between visits.
A spiritual question usually slides in sideways during the conversation—just in passing, you understand. And that’s when we get down to what’s really bothering them, that thing that they don’t really want anyone else to know about. That thing they know I will keep confidential; if intervention is needed, I guide them into doing so themselves. I keep wanting to explain to people that this kind of relationship belongs to MY grandmother, not me. I wonder if she felt the same way when she became the matriarchal glue that held the family together. I admit, it’s a rite of passage I didn’t expect but now that I’m here, I better figure out how to do what everyone thinks I know how to do.
What I have figured out is, I better have my spiritual life in shape if others are going to look to me for answers, especially when I don’t have those answers. I finally figured out it all comes down to time. I need all those life experiences to draw from too, but mostly I need to appreciate the value of time. Older people usually understand what it means to say time is fleeting. I no longer look at the clock to see if I have time to read a few verses or that daily devotional. Instead, I truly pray and read and pray some more to make my spiritual house stronger today than it was yesterday.
I’m VERY careful about what television shows or movies I watch, and what books I read. I look for ways to calm my spirit and my mind, such as a recent YouTube video. At first, I thought, “I don’t need 9 minutes to hear how to slow down and practice gratitude thinking,” but I promised my cousin I’d watch so I did. Remember how the book of Esther never mentions God, but you can just see/feel His hand at work throughout that story? Same thing happened when I watched that gratitude video. Even if you’re not the family matriarch (yet), I encourage you to find nine minutes alone and watch that video. I found it incredibly calming and encouraging – I hope you do, too.
